Forgive
by docsangel
Summary: When Happy and two of his brothers need a place to lay low for a while, Happy calls the one person that he's always counted on but letting him back into her home, will she let him back into her heart?
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1

Sitting at home in my cabin, hidden away where no one can find me, that's how I like it. I am sitting here drinking a beer and watching Netflix when my phone rings. "Hello." I say as I answer because I don't recognize the number. "Hey little girl." I hear that raspy voice say. "What do you need?" I ask because the only time I hear from him is when he needs something. "Need a place to lay low." he tells me. "Just you?" I ask. "Three of us." he tells me. I sigh and say "Come on." I tell him. "Be there shortly." he says before hanging up. I get up and start getting my guest rooms ready for them. I have two guest rooms so one of them is sleeping on the couch.

A half hour later, I hear a knock on my door. Opening the door, in walks Happy, Tig and Quinn. "Come on in." I say. Once everyone was inside, I close and lock the door. "This is Tig and Quinn." he tells me. "I'm Raven. Make yourselves at home guys. I have two guest rooms so one of you will have to take the couch. Beer is in the fridge and so are leftovers." I tell them. "Thanks for this doll." Tig says. We all head to the kitchen and I start handing out beers. "So, how to do you two know each other?" Quinn asks. "She's my Old Lady." Happy says and Tig spits out his beer. "What?" Quinn says. "Estranged Old Lady." I say glaring at Happy. "What happened?" Tig asks. "I tell you what. I'll tell you but you have to do something for me." I say. "What's that?" Tig asks. "Get this asshole to sign the fucking divorce papers." I say before leaving the kitchen to head to my bedroom. "You're married?" Quinn asks. "Yeah. Five years now." Happy says. "Why won't you sign the papers?" Tig asks. "Don't want it." he says. "You still love her?" Tig asks and Happy just nods. "You need to talk to her dude." Quinn says and Happy just nods again.

I walk back into the kitchen and say "I have both rooms ready and there's a pillow and blanket on the couch. How long do you plan on staying?" I ask Happy. "Don't know yet." Happy says. "Well, I'm hitting the shower and heading to bed. Night guys." I say before leaving the room. "You two take the guest rooms." Happy says before finishing his beer and heading down the hall. "You know about her?" Quinn asks. "Nah. You?" he asks. "No brother. Wonder what happened there?" Tig asks. "Don't know. Not our business brother." Quinn says before they head to the guest rooms.

I get out of the shower and get dressed in a pair of short shorts and tank top. Heading into the bedroom, I see Happy laying in my bed. "I made the couch up for you." I tell him. "Don't want the couch." he tells me. "Fine. I'll take the couch." I say. "Get in the bed little girl." he tells me. "Happy, you can't just come in here and think you're going to just sleep in my bed. We're not together anymore." I tell him calmly. "You're still my wife and you still have my crow." he tells me. "Only because I can't get it covered until I get the divorce and you won't sign the papers." I tell him. I go to leave the room and he moves from the bed to the door and blocks my way. "We need to talk." he tells me. "There's nothing to talk about Happy. You're the one that cheated on me and left me. You can't expect me to just pretend nothing happened. Plus you'll be gone again in a few days and I won't see you again until you need something." I tell him, not looking at him. "Just come to bed please. I just want to hold my wife." he says. I look at him and say "I'll take the couch." before pushing past him and heading to the living room.

Waking up the next morning and I am still on the couch. I open my eyes and lay there gathering my bearings and hear soft snores. I sit up a little and see Happy in the recliner sleeping. I lay there and watching him a minute before shaking my head and getting up to get dressed for the day. Moving to the kitchen, I start breakfast and coffee. Once it's done, I move to wake Happy up and ask "Can you get the other two up please?" before turning back to the kitchen. I make three plates and put down coffees before they walk into the kitchen. "Thanks doll." Tig says. "Enjoy guys." I say before taking my coffee out to the back deck. "What happened last night?" Tig asks. "Nothing." Happy says before finishing his breakfast.

Tig walks out to the back deck with his coffee and takes the seat next to me. "How long have you two been together?" Tig asks. "Had his crow five years, been married three." I tell him. "What happened?" he asks. "Found out he was cheating on me. Went to see him at the local clubhouse to tell him I was pregnant and when I got to his dorm, he had a sweetbutt bent over the bed. I had a car accident on the way home and lost the baby. He packed his shit and left the next day." I tell him and he says "Shit doll. How long ago was that?" he asks. "Two years." I tell him. "Well, a lot's happened in two years. He's changed." he tells me. "Doesn't matter. All I want is for him to sign the damn divorce papers so I can cover up the crow and move on." I tell him. "Sweetheart, maybe you should talk to him. He needs you right now." Tig says and I see how sad he is. "What happened Tig?" I ask. "He tell you about SAMCRO?" he asks and I nod my head yes. "We've lost three brothers in the last couple of months. Been trying to get our club into legit shit and he's starting to re-prioritize what's important in his life." he tells me. "Well, it's too late on this end." I tell him before heading inside and to my room, closing the door.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

I spent most of the day in my room alone while the guys were in the living room talking. I hear a knock on the door and when it opens, Happy walks in and sits on the side of the bed. "Can we talk?" he ask. "Did you find out how long you'll be here?" I ask. "Not yet. Club's working on it." he tells me and I nod. "I still want to talk." he tells me. "Happy, there's nothing to talk about." I say softly, not wanting to argue. "Yeah babe there is." he says. "Don't call me that." I say. "Raven, I fucked up. I know I did." he tells me. "What do you want Happy?" I ask. He takes my hand and looks down at our hands before saying "I want my wife back." I pull my hand from his and say "I don't want that." I tell him. "Why not?" he asks getting pissed. "Happy, you cheated on me and left me alone when I lost our baby. Why the hell would I put myself through that again?" I ask getting just as pissed. "I've changed." he tells me, speaking a little softer. "Really? How have you changed? You still hooking up with anything that walks?" I ask and he looks down. "You willing to give all that shit up? You willing to be faithful to just me?" I ask. "Yeah. I am." he says. I shake my head and say "Do you know how many times you promised you would be faithful to me? And you'll stay faithful for a month before you find yourself in bed with yet another bitch that's not me." I say. I take a deep breath to calm myself and say "Happy, I realized a long time ago that I'm never going to be enough for you. I just want a divorce so I can move on. You already have. Why can't I?" I ask and feel a tear fall. "Little girl. Look at me. You are enough for me. I was just too stupid to see it. Just give me another chance." he says softly, wiping the tears from my cheeks. "I can't Happy. I'm sorry." I tell him. He lets go of my hand and stands. "I love you Raven." he says before leaving the room and I lay down and sob into my pillow.

After a couple of hours, I get myself together and move to the kitchen to make dinner for the guys. I get it done and get their plates together and put them on the table with beers and tell the guys "Dinner's done." I say before heading to my room again. "Doll you need to eat." Tig says. "I'm okay. Enjoy guys." I say before heading into my room and closing the door. "She okay?" Quinn asks. "No. Told her I wanted her back and she doesn't want that." Happy says. "Shit man. Then you gotta change her mind." Tig says. Happy looks at him and Tig says "We're limited on what you can do with us being here. Cook for her. Show her you're serious." Tig says and Happy nods.

That night, I get a shower and head to bed. The house is quiet and I doze off. A little later, I feel the bed dip down and an arm go around me. I try to pull away but he rasps "I just want to hold my wife." and pulls me closer and I feel him nuzzle his nose against my neck. "Hap…" I start. "Please." he says. I turn to face him and he's just looking at me and he says "I need you." I shake my head and ask "So, what? You think I'm going to let you fuck me and leave again?" He shakes his head and says "No. I need to feel you close. Please." He says and I just look at him. I caress his face and ask "What's going on Hap?" He leans into my touch and says "We lost Jax and Bobby and hell, even Juice. We lost Gemma too. Just lost so many people here lately that were important to me and I realized the most important person to me wasn't with me." he tells me. "Happy, I can't. I've spent the last two years alone. Hell I was alone before that. You never wanted to settle down and I know that. But when I lost the baby, I couldn't take it anymore. I knew I wouldn't be enough for you so I gave up. I can't be what you need." I tell him. "Baby, you're all I need. I am so fucking sorry." he tells me. He puts his forehead to mine and says "I just want to hold you. Please." he says softly. "I can't Happy." I say as I pull away from him and head out to the back deck and sit.

I've been sitting out there for a few minutes when Tig comes out and sits next to me. "You okay?" he asks. "Not even close." I tell him. "He loves you." he tells me. "Doesn't matter." I tell him. "You don't love him?" he asks. "Me loving him was never the problem. I can't trust him. He'll tell me he loves me and wants me and then next thing I know he's coming home with hickies all over his neck. I can't put myself through that again." I say. "What if he proves it to you?" he asks. "Tig, he's stuck here and just wanting to get his dick wet. That's all it is." I tell him. "That what you think?" Tig asks and I nod my head yes. "Let me tell you something about your Old Man. He tell you about what happened?" he asks. "He told me about Jax, Bobby, Juice and Gemma." I tell him. "Once we lost them, he's not been the same. He's not touched another woman. He's been spending a lot of time by himself. He started realizing that he didn't want that shit anymore. He didn't want the whores anymore. He wants to be with you doll." he tells me. "What do I do?" I ask. "I'm not saying to let your guard down but just let him prove it. Let him show you and if he fucks up again, I'll make sure he leaves you alone." he tells me and I nod. "He says he just wanted to hold me." I say. "Then let him. Let him show you. But set your own rules." he tells me. "It's something to think about. Thanks Tig." I say before heading back to bed. Climbing into bed, he doesn't touch me. I lay facing him and we just look at each other. "I just need time Hap. I don't trust you and that's going to take time and work." I tell him. "I know." he tells me. "While you're here, you can sleep in here with me but that's all I can give you right now." I tell him. "Okay." he says. After a couple of minutes of us just looking at each other, he asks "Can I hold you?" I look at him for a minute and nod my head. He pulls me close and I snuggle into him. I've missed him but I can't let him in again. Not completely. I feel him kiss the top of my head and whisper "Good night little girl." I snuggle closer and whisper "Good night Hap." before we both drift off to sleep.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

Waking up the next morning, I am on my side with my back to Happy and he's holding me close to him. I lay there awake and just think. I can't do this. I'll just let him sleep in here while he's here but once he's gone again, that's it. I don't even care if he signs the papers anymore. I've been alone this long. Fuck it. I slip out of bed and make breakfast. Walking into my bedroom, I wake Happy up. "Hap. Breakfast is done." I say. I go to walk away and he pulls me to him. Kissing my cheek he says "I'll be right there." I nod and head to wake the other two up. After getting their plates and coffees on the table, I get my coffee and they all walk in at the same time. "Enjoy guys." I say before grabbing my coffee off the counter and heading to my room. "You need to eat." Happy tells me. "I'll eat when I get to work." I tell him. "Where do you work?" Tig asks. "Works for a construction company. Secretary." Happy says and I roll my eyes. Of course he knows where I work. I move to the bedroom to get dressed and am putting on my boots when Happy walks into the bedroom. "You don't have to work." he tells me. "Yeah I do. I have bills." I tell him. "What about the money I send you?" he asks. I move to the drawer and pull out the small lockbox and open it. "You can have it back." I tell him. "You've not been using it?" he asks. "I can pay my own bills Happy. Been doing it for two years." I tell him. He shakes his head. "I gotta go." I tell him. As I go to pass him, he gently grabs my wrist. When I stop and look at him, he tilts my chin up and kisses me softly and say "I love you." I nod before pulling away from him and heading out the door.

I walk into work and sit at my desk to get started entering the paperwork from the previous day. "Hey Raven." Jacob says. "Hey." I say simply, not looking up at him. "How was your weekend?" he asks. "Good. Yours?" I ask. "Good. Hey, I wanted to see if you maybe want to get something to eat after work?" he asks. "I appreciate the invite but I have plans." I tell him. "Plans?" he asks and I roll my eyes. "Yes. Plans." I tell him and go back to the paperwork. "Are you seeing someone?" he asks. "Jacob, I'm married." I tell him just to get him to leave me alone. "Married?" he asks shocked. "Yes. Been married a few years now. So, now, I really need to get this done." I tell him and he shakes his head and walks away. I get back to work and lunch rolls around. I am sitting outside and my burner rings. "Hello." I say. "Hey Little Girl." I hear his raspy voice say. "Hey." I say when I realize it's Happy. "Just wanted to see what you wanted for dinner." he says. "I'm fine Happy. I'll make something when I get home." I tell him softly. "Babe…" he starts. "Please don't do that." I tell him. "Raven, I'm trying here." he tells me. "Don't." I almost whisper before hanging up and taking a deep breath to keep from crying again. "Trouble in paradise?" Jacob asks. "Nope." I tell him and stand up to leave but he grabs my wrist and grips it tight. "I can treat you better than he can." he tells me. "I'm not interested." I tell him and he gets pissed and backhands me. Realizing what he's done, he pulls back. "I'm so sorry." he says. "Just get away from me." I say before heading back inside. I head to the bathroom and my face is red where he hit me and there are bruises already forming on my wrist. Shit. Hap's gonna be pissed.

After finishing out the day, a few people looking at me, wondering what happened but no one asks. My boss Carrie walks over and asks "Can I talk to you?" I nod and follow her to her office. "Why don't you take a few days? Give that bruise time to go away. You want to tell me what happened?" she asks. "Not really." I tell her and she says "If someone is hurting you...I heard you tell Jacob you were married. Is your husband hurting you?" she asks. I laugh. "My husband has never laid hands on me like this. Don't worry about it." I tell her before getting up and saying "See you in a couple of days."

I walk into the house and head right to the bedroom to get my cream out to put on the bruises. I shut the bathroom door but didn't lock it and as soon as it opens, Happy sees my face. Cupping my face gently he asks "What the fuck?" I pull away from him and say "Not your concern." before trying to push past him. "Not my concern? You're my fucking wife." he says. "Only on paper Hap. Please. Just don't." I plead and my eyes start tearing up a little and I try to hide it from him but he pulls me to him and the more I try to pull away the closer he holds me. When he finally lets me go, he asks "You hurt anywhere else?" before grabbing my wrist and seeing the bruises. "Who did this Raven?" he asks softly and I don't answer. "Please don't make me pull the crow card." He says and I glare at him. "Glare all you want. My crow. My pussy. Now tell me. Who did this to you?" I sit down on the side of the bed and say "Guy at work. Asked me out and I told him I was married. Heard us talking today and started telling me he could be better to me and when I said I wasn't interested and went to walk away he grabbed me and backhanded me." I tell him. I could see his jaw twitch. "You can't do anything. You're hiding here because you're in trouble. You can't even leave." I tell him. He pulls me closer, gently and kisses me softly. "I'll get it handled." he tells me. "Don't bother. Not your problem." I say before pulling away and walking into the kitchen for a beer and heading outside to the swing.

Quinn follows me out and sits with me. "You okay?" he asks. "I don't even know anymore." I tell him. "What happened?" he asks pointing to my face. "Dumb fuck at work asked me out and when I told him I wasn't interested and was married he backhanded me. Hap's flipping out about it and can't do anything while he's closed up here. Told him not to worry about it. It's not his problem anymore." I tell him. "You thinking about letting him back in at all?" he asks. "Just trying to keep the peace until he's gone again. I can't go through that again." I tell Quinn. "He loves you." he tells me. "I know. I love him but I can't trust him." I tell him.

That night, Happy and I are in bed and he pulls me close. Kissing me softly, I let him deepen the kiss. When we separate, he puts his forehead to mine and I say "This doesn't mean we're getting back together but I need you." I say before kissing him again. He deepens the kiss before hovering over me. We start to shed clothes and he enters me slowly, thrusting in and out slow and easy and when we both find our release, he pulls me into his side and after a few minutes I say "I'm going to get a shower." I get in the shower and let the tears fall. I love him so much but I've never been enough for him. I won't be. After getting myself together, I head out to the back deck with a blanket and just sit. After a while, Happy joins me. Sitting next to me, he throws an arm around me and asks "What can I do to change your mind?" I shake my head and say "I don't know."


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

The next morning, I wake up with Happy's arms around me, holding me close. I feel him kiss the top of my head and whisper "Morning little girl." I pull away from him and say "Morning giant." before moving to get out of bed, refusing to look at him. "Let me see." he says and I finally look at him. The bruise isn't as bad today. "Couple more days and it should be gone. You using that cream?" he asks and I nod. "I'll start breakfast." I tell him. "I'll cook." he tells me and I look at him. Walking over to me, he kisses me softly and says "Relax today." I nod before he kisses me one more time and walks out of the room. I sit on the side of the bed and the tears start falling.

After breakfast, Tig's phone rings and he takes it out to the deck to answer. A few minutes later, he comes back in and says "Got the all clear. You're officially rid of us doll." he says and I just nod and take my coffee out to the back deck. Sitting on the steps, I look out at the yard and just think about all the nights I sat out there alone after Happy left me. He's going to be gone again and I can't decide if that's a good thing or a bad thing. "You okay?" I hear Happy ask as he sits beside me. "Figured you'd be packing you shit to go." I say. "Don't want to go." he tells me. "Happy…" I start. "Hear me out." he says. "Let me come home. I'll sleep in one of the guest rooms and we start from scratch. Do you remember all the times we would wake up in the middle of the night and just go for a ride?" he asks. "I remember. I also remember all the times we'd end up at the bluffs and me bent over your bike." I tell him. "Some of my favorite times." he says smirking. "Of course it was." I say before looking back out at the yard. "I remember all those nights sitting in that swing around the fire just talking about what we wanted for ourselves." he says. "Yeah. Finally got it and lost it all." I say and feel a tear fall. I look at him finally and say "Go on. Just give me a few days to think about shit." I tell him. "Okay." he says before kissing me softly. "I love you." he tells me again. "I know." I whisper before he stands and goes to get his things.

Pulling up at the clubhouse, the three of them dismount their bikes and head inside the clubhouse. "Church." Chibs says before they all head into chapel. Once inside, Chibs says "Now that we got shit taken care of, where were you guys hiding out?" he asks. "I had a place." Happy says and they look at him confused because he always stays at the clubhouse. "I thought you were somewhere that wasn't connected to you?" TO asks. "We were. It's Hap's Old Lady's house." Tig says smirking and Happy glares at him. "Wait. You have an Old Lady?" Rat asks. "Yeah brothers I do. Had my crow five years, been married three and separated two." he says and they all look at him shocked. "Holy shit." Montez says. "Why have you never brought her around?" Chibs asks. "Because he pissed her off." Tig says and Happy just shakes his head. "Trying to make shit right with her." Happy says. "Well, congrats brother. Hope it works out for you." Chibs says and they go on with the meeting.

That night, I am laying in bed, reading a book when my phone rings. "Hello." I say, not looking at the caller ID. "Hey Raven." I hear Jacob's voice on the other end of the line. "What do you want Jacob and how did you get my number?" I ask. "Doesn't matter how. I got your address too. Thought I'd come by for a talk." he says. "No, you won't. I told you I'm not interested and I didn't rat you out to the boss so just leave me alone." I tell him. "Well, I know you said you're married but I also know you're separated. So, you're going to let me take you out." he tells me. "No, I'm not." I tell him. "You will. You belong to me now." he tells me and I hear the malice in his voice. I hang up the phone and I look at the contacts and contemplate calling Happy but my phone rings again and it's Happy's name I see. "Happy." I say simply. "Hey. What's wrong?" he asks, hearing the anxiety in my voice. "I'm okay. What do you need?" I ask. "You're not okay. I know you Raven. Talk to me babe." he says. "It's nothing. What do you need?" I ask again. "Wanted to check on you." he tells me. "I'm fine Hap. I'm not your problem anymore." I tell him softly, still feeling a little uneasy. "You were never my problem. You're my wife." he tells me. I am silent for a minute before I ask "Can you come over? Please?" I ask softly, almost a whisper. "Be there in a few." he tells me before ending the call.

Twenty minutes later, I hear a knock on the door and I look through the peephole and see Happy standing there. I open the door and he walks in and pulls me to him and I didn't realize how much safer I felt with him until this moment. He tilts my head up and kisses me softly and says "I ain't going anywhere babe." I nod and pull him closer. A few minutes later there's another knock on the door. "You expecting anyone?" he asks and I shake my head no. He looks through the peephole and says "Some dude." I look and see it's Jacob. I tense up and Happy asks. "This why you're freaked out?" I nod my head and he says "Stay behind me." I nod and he opens the door. "You lost?" Happy asks. "I'm here to see Raven." Jacob says. "Leave Jacob. I told you to leave me alone." I say from behind Happy. "Who's this?" Jacob asks. "Her Old Man. Now she told you to leave her alone and that's what you're gonna do while that's still an option because you come near my Old Lady again and I will make you disappear." Happy says and Jacob visibly stiffens before running to his car and leaving. Happy closes the door and turns to me and says "I'm not leaving you again." I nod and he pulls me closer. "I love you Raven Lowman." he whispers. I look up at him and say "I love you Happy." before he picks me up and carries me back to bed. Getting undressed, we both climb into bed and for the first time in two years I let myself just be close to him without pushing him away.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

Waking up the next morning, I get up and start getting dressed. "Where are you going?" Happy asks. "I have to work Happy." I tell him. "You don't have to Raven." he tells me. I stop what I'm doing and look at him. "Happy, I can't just quit my job." I tell him. He gets up and walks over to me. Pulling me close and he asks "Just think about it okay?" I nod and say "I will." Kissing me softly he says "I will take you and pick you up. At least until we make sure this Jacob fucker leaves you alone." he tells me and I say "Thank you Happy." He cups my face and says "I will always protect you Raven." I put my arms around his neck and pull him to me and kiss him softly.

We pull up at work and I see Jacob's car and tense. "If you need me, call me. I don't care where I am, I'll be here and if I can't I'll send Tig or Quinn." he tells me. I nod and he kisses me softly. "I love you." he says. "I love you too." I tell him softly. Handing him my helmet, I grab my purse and head inside. Sitting at my desk, I see Jacob watching me so I keep my head down. "Hey Raven." my boss says. "Hey Carrie." I say. "Can we talk?" she asks. I nod and follow her into her office. "There's been a complaint against you for sexual harassment." she says. I look at her shocked and ask "Who?" She takes her seat and says "Jacob." I shake my head and say "What is he saying I did?" I ask. "That you've been calling him and trying to get him to go out with you and he's told you no and that you won't leave him alone. Because if this complaint, we're going to have to put you on unpaid leave while we investigate." she tells me. I stand up and say "Don't worry about it. I quit." I tell her before walking out of her office. I walk to my desk and put the few things I have there in my bag and pull out my burner as soon as I walk away from my desk. "Hey babe." he says as he answers. "Can you come get me?" I ask. "You okay?" he asks. "Just please come get me." I say and am almost in tears. "On my way. I love you." he says. "Love you." I say before hanging up.

Sitting outside waiting on Happy, I see someone out of the corner of my eye and see it's Jacob. I get up to start to walk away and he grabs my arm tightly. "Let go." I say and try to pull away from him but he doesn't let go. "I told you that you were mine. I will have you Raven." he says. About that time, we hear the roar of a motorcycle and he pulls me close. "I will be back for you." he tells me before letting go and running away. Happy pulls up and I am in the midst of a panic attack. He jumps off his bike and runs to me. Cupping my face he says "Breathe with me baby. In with me. Out with me. Match my breaths." he tells me and my breathing calms down some. Pulling me close, he whispers in my ear "Talk to me baby." I shake my head and say "Just take me home please." He cups my face again and kisses me softly before carrying me to his bike and putting me on before putting my helmet on and then getting on and putting on his own, we head home.

Pulling up to my house, I get off the bike and he follows me. Walking into the house, he tries to pull me close and I pull away. "I just need a minute." I tell him. He nods and I move to the kitchen, trying to get myself together. I sit at the island and put my head in my hands and the tears fall. All of a sudden I feel his arms wrap around me from behind and I turn in his arms. "I got you baby." He says. I get myself together and he asks "What happened?" I shake my head no. He cups my face and says "Talk to me little girl. I can't fix it if you don't tell me." I pull away from him and say "When I got to work, my boss wanted to see me. Said they were putting me on unpaid leave while they investigated some bull shit complaint that was filed against me for sexual harassment." I tell him. "What?" he asks confused. "Apparently I've been asking one of the guys out at work and won't leave him alone when he told me no." I tell him. "That fuck from last night?" he asks and I nod my head yes. "Lock the door." he tells me and heads towards the door. I run after him and grab his arm to stop him. He turns to look at me and I say "That's not all." He lets go of the door and I say "I told them I quit and got my things before calling you. While I was waiting for you, Jacob came up and when I tried to walk away he grabbed my arm again and pulled me to him telling me that I am his and that he will come for me soon." I tell him. "Pack a bag. We're going to the clubhouse." he says. I shake my head and say "This isn't your problem Happy. I'll figure it out." I tell him. Taking a deep breath to keep from throwing me into another panic attack, he tilts my chin up to look at him and says "Get a bag. We'll handle this. I'm not letting you go again." he tells me. I kiss him softly and say "Okay." I move to the bedroom and start packing a bag. Walking out to his bike, he gets on and I get on behind him and wrap my arms around him. He pulls my hand up to his lips to kiss my knuckles before taking off towards the clubhouse.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

Pulling up at the clubhouse, we get off the bike and head inside, hand in hand. When we walk in, Tig and Quinn come up and hug me. "You okay doll?" Tig asks and I shake my head no. A man with scars on his face walks up and introduces himself. "Hey Lass. I'm Chibs." he says. "Raven Lowman." I say and you see Happy smile slightly as he looks down at me. "You okay?" Chibs asks and just like with Tig I just shake my head no. "I need everyone in church. Her too." Happy says and Chibs turns and calls "Church!"

Once everyone is inside, Happy pulled a chair over beside him for me to sit in. Once we are all seated, Happy laces his fingers with mine and pulls my hand to his lips and kisses my knuckles like he used to when I was stressed out. "What's going on brother?" Chibs says. "Guys, this is Raven, my Old Lady. My wife." he says and looks at me. "Welcome Lass." Chibs says and everyone introduces themselves. "Now, what can we help with?" Chibs asks. "When the three of us were staying with Raven, she came home from work with bruises on her wrist and one on her face from where a fucker she worked with hit her. After we got the clear to come back, she got a call from him telling her that he knew where she lived and that she was going to let him take her out and shit. Showed up at her house after I got there. Well, today, she goes to work and some other shit happened." Happy says and looks at me. I look up at him and he nods. "When I got to work this morning, my boss called me to her office. They were putting me on unpaid leave while they investigated a bull shit complaint of sexual harassment. The guy told them that I was asking him out and wouldn't leave him alone when he said no. I told them I quit because Happy told me to think about quitting." I say and look up at him. He kisses my knuckles again and I take a deep breath. "While I was waiting on Happy to pick me up, the guy came out and when I tried to walk away, he grabbed my wrist and pulled me to him telling me I am his and that he will be back for me. When Happy got there, he took off and I was having a panic attack." I tell them and look down at my hand in Happy's. "Well, Lass, can you draw him out for us? I'm sure your Old Man has told you over the years how we do things. He won't hurt you again." he tells me. "I can call him and get him to the house." I say and see Happy glare at the table. I look at Chibs and ask "Can I get a minute with my husband please?" They nod and step outside. I stand up and turn his chair to face me. Sitting in his lap, he instinctively pulls me closer and nuzzles is nose against my neck. I missed that. I tilt his chin up to look at me. "Hap, I can get him to the house. I need to be there when you do this. Please. I'll do whatever you tell me to do and I promise I'll be okay. I need to be there." I say. He kisses me softly and says "Okay but you do exactly what I tell you to do." he tells me. "I will baby." I say. He looks at me for a second and asks "Are we okay?" Kissing him one more time, I say "We're working on it. I'm giving you the benefit of the doubt Happy but please…" I start. "I won't fuck up again." he tells me. "Okay...and you can move back into the house." I tell him. Smiling softly, he says "Okay."

The guys come back in and we start getting a game plan together. I use my phone to call Jacob and get him to the house. "Hello Raven." he says and this time, instead of scaring me, it pisses me off. "Jacob." I say. "You finally decide to give me a chance?" he asks. "Actually I thought maybe you could come over and we could talk about that." I tell him. "What about your husband?" he asks. "Like you said. We're separated. You don't have to worry about him." I tell him. "Okay. So when are you free?" he asks. "You can come over now if you want. We can talk and spend a little time together." I tell him. "Be there in thirty." he says. "See you then." I say and hang up the phone. "You did good little girl." Happy says. I look at Happy and say "Let's get this fucker."


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

Thirty minutes later, we are all sitting in my living room and Happy is holding me close. "I love you." he whispers in my ear. "I love you." I whisper back. Putting my forehead to his, I caress his cheek. Looking around, I see the guys all looking at us and smiling. A few minutes later, we hear a knock on the door. The guys head for the kitchen, out of sight, and I open the door. "Hey Jacob." I say. "Raven." he says as he walks in. I shut the door and lock it and he turns to face me. "You finally decide you're mine?" he asks smirking. Before I can say anything, the guys come out from the kitchen and they surround him. "What the fuck?" Jacob asks. "You put your hands on my wife too many times. Now I get to kill you." Happy says. "Not on my carpet. Take him to the basement." I say and they all smirk at me.

We get him to the basement and I sit back and watch Happy torture Jacob. As soon as it's done, and he's dead, the guys start talking about how to get rid of his body without being seen. "I have an idea." I tell them and they look at me. "Rat, there's a saw over there if you don't care to grab it." I tell him and he does as I ask. "What are you thinking little one?" Quinn asks. "Cut him up and wrap him so it doesn't look like a body. It will be easier to get him out of the house to bury him." I tell them. "Damn Hap. She is your Old Lady." Quinn says and they all start laughing and Happy says "Oh yes she is."

After disposing of the body, we head to the clubhouse. Happy still wanted us to stay there for a couple of days so that I could get to know the guys a little. We're hanging out, having a few beers and I ask Happy "You need another?" He nods and kisses me before I head to the bar for both of us a fresh beer. I get to the bar and tell the prospect what I need and while he's getting it, a woman barely wearing anything comes up. "Happy hasn't touched any of us in months and you walk in here and think you're special because he wants to get his dick wet? Honey, he don't do fat bitches and we were here first." she tells me. "First of all, he hasn't touched you since we got back together. I'm his wife. His Old Lady so yeah, I'm fucking special but as far as my fat ass? Honey he worships my fat ass and I'm the one he's going to have screaming his name tonight. Not you. Not any of your nasty ass friends. So, you're best bet right now is to back the fuck off because if you think he's scary when he's pissed? You should see his wife." I say before taking the beers and walking off. The entire room heard what I said to her. "He'll come back to us when he gets tired of fucking the same pussy every night. From what I hear, it won't be the first time." she says and I stop. Lyla takes the two beers from me and I turn around. "Let me make myself clear. One more word about me or my husband and I'll blow what little brains you have out...with his gun." I tell her and her eyes go wide. "You're crazy." she tells me. "Remember that." I tell her before taking the beers from Lyla and heading over, back to Happy's lap.

That night, we go to bed in his dorm and are lying in bed. "You did good with that croweater." he tells me. "I won't let another bitch take what's mine." I tell him as I snuggle into him. "Don't have to worry about that babe. I'm not going anywhere and I won't fuck up again." he tells me. "I hope not." I tell him, my insecurities coming through a little. He tilts my chin up and says "I won't mess up again. I'm yours baby." I nod and kiss him softly. He deepens the kiss but these kisses aren't rough like I'm used to from him. They are slow and soft and passionate. He hovers over me and we start to shed clothes. He enters me and thrusts in and out slow and easy and it's not like him at all. The entire time he's either kissing me or has his forehead to mine. When we both reach our release, I cup his face and ask "What is it?" He kisses me softly and says "I just want to show you how much I love you." I kiss him one more time and say "I love you too baby. I never stopped." I tell him. He lays facing me and pulls me into his chest and that's how I fall asleep.


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8

Waking up the next morning, I'm in bed alone. I get up and get dressed and feel that dull ache in my core and can't help but smile. I head out to the main room and see Happy sitting at the bar drinking his coffee. I walk up to him and sit beside him and the prospect puts a coffee in front of me. "Thanks." I say. I look at Happy and he leans over and kisses me softly. "Morning babe." he says. "Morning." I say softly. He looks at me concerned and I smile softly. "I'm okay. But I could go for another kiss." I say. He smirks before kissing me one more time and deepening the kiss just a little.

After our coffee, he has to work in the garage and Venus walks over. "Morning Sweetheart." she says. "Morning Venus." I say as she kisses my cheek. "How are you little one?" she asks. "Better. Still feels strange being back with Hap and I still worry but I'm giving him the benefit of the doubt." I tell her. "He's changed just in the time I'm known him. Since things started changing with the club. He's just...different." she tells me. "I'm quickly seeing that." I tell her. We stand up and walk outside and sit at one of the picnic tables. Looking over, I see Happy working on one of the cars in the bays and see the same Croweater from the night before watching him. She walks over and starts running her hand up his back and I see her lean down and whisper something. He turns to look at her and tells her "I ain't interested." and goes back to the car. She starts rubbing up on him again and I start walking over and hear her say "I can ride that big dick better than that fat bitch can. Let me have the big dick Happy." she purrs. I grab her by her hair and slam her head against the car and she falls to the ground. I reach back and Happy hands me his gun. I put it to her head and ask "Did you think I was kidding? I will blow your fucking brains out." I tell her and she shakes her head no. "He's off fucking limits." I tell her and she nods her head yes that she understands. I let her up and she runs off.

Happy pulls me to him and kisses me deeply. When we separate I whisper "Fuck me Daddy." He growls against my lips and pulls me into the garage. The other guys leave and pull down the bay doors for us as they go. Happy puts me against the wall, facing the wall before pulling my jeans down. I feel him at my entrance before he slides into my warm, wet heat and starts to thrust in and out hard and fast with his hand over my mouth to muffle my cries. I find my release around his hard cock before he finds his inside me. After getting dressed, he kisses me softly and says "I love you little girl." I smile and say "I love you Giant." before walking away, leaving him there to open the bay doors back up and get back to work with a smile on his face.

Walking over to the picnic table where Venus is, now joined by Lyla, they smirk as I walk up. "What?" I ask. "Put a whore in her place and took care of your man." Lyla says. "Not my first rodeo but definitely my favorite." I tell them and they both start laughing.

After he gets off work, we are hanging around the clubhouse with Tig and Venus. "What's this I hear you schooled a whore?" Tig asks. "I told her if she touched him again that I'd put a bullet in her head with his gun. I just showed her I wasn't playing. Then I showed my man that he's mine." I tell him. Happy leans over and says "Head to the dorm and you can claim me again." as he places soft kisses to my neck. Getting up, we head to the dorm and as soon as the door is locked, he picks me up and lays me down on the bed. Kissing me deeply, when we separate, I whisper "Claim me Happy."


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9

Waking up the next morning, Happy is wrapped around me and I can't help but smile. I slip out of bed and head to the main room for coffee. Sitting at the bar beside Quinn, the prospect hands me a coffee. "Thanks." I say and he nods. "How'd you sleep little one?" he asks. "Good. Real good. You?" I ask. "Good. Where's your old man?" he asks. "Right here." I hear Happy say behind me as he wraps his arms around my waist. I turn my face and kiss him softly. "Morning babe." he says. "Morning." I say softly. He looks at me and arches his brow like he's asking if I'm okay and I nod slightly letting him know I am. He sits beside me and I listen to him and Quinn talk.

After coffee, Happy says "Let's go for a ride before we go home." I nod and we head out to the bike. He ties my bag onto the back of the bike and we head out. We ride for a while before pulling up to the streams. Getting off the bike, we walk over to the water hand in hand. Sitting on the grass, he pulls me in between his legs and I lean back into him. "I miss this." I say. "What?" he asks. "Riding with you. Sitting like this. Just us." I tell him. "I miss it too." he says before kissing the top of my head. We both sit there in silence and just enjoy being close. After a while, he leans down to my ear and whispers "Thank you." I look at him confused and he says "For giving this another chance." I turn in his arms and move to straddle him. Cupping his face I say "I missed you Happy. I was miserable." I tell him. "I'm sorry for everything little girl." he says. "Me too." I say and he looks at me confused. "I felt like I had forced you into marrying me and giving me your crow." I tell him. "Baby, you never forced me to do anything. I didn't do anything I didn't want to do. I wanted you to wear my crow. I wanted to marry you. I wanted a family with you." he says. "I know I fucked up and I'll spend the rest of my life making it up to you but baby don't ever think I didn't want you." he tells me. I kiss him softly and whisper "Clean slate right?" I ask. "Clean slate." he says before kissing me again.

After sitting at the streams and talking, we head home and I move to the kitchen. "What are you doing?" he asks. "Making dinner." I tell him. "We can order in." he tells me. "Nope. I'm cooking my husband dinner. Go get a shower while I get it started." I tell him. He kisses me deeply and says "I love you Raven." I smile softly and say "I love you too Happy. Now go." He smiles that rare smile that only I get to see before doing what I told him. I turn to the cabinets and start pulling out what I need to make dinner.

After dinner, I head to the shower while happy lays in bed. When I get out, I climb into bed and snuggle into his side. "I want to talk to you about something." he tells me. "What's that?" I ask as I look up at him. "What would you say to us trying for a kid?" he asks and I look at him shocked. I sit up a little and ask "Are you sure?" He pulls me to him and kisses me and says "I told you I want this. You have my crow and my last name. Time I man up and give you the baby I promised you when we got married." he tells me. I kiss him again and start to straddle him. "What are you doing baby?" he asks. I smirk and say "Making a little Lowman." before he pulls me down to kiss him before turning us over and we start to shed clothes before he enters me and we spend the rest of the night making love.


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 10

Waking up the next morning, I'm in bed alone. I get up and head to the kitchen to get a cup of coffee and hear Happy on the phone. "Shit...Yeah...Okay...I'll be there soon." he tells the person on the phone. He turns to see me standing there and I ask "What's wrong?" giving him the benefit of the doubt. He runs his hand down his face and says "Chick at the clubhouse brought a kid. Said he's mine." he tells me. "How old is he?" I ask. "Three months." he tells me. "Let's get a paternity test done and go from there." I tell him but don't look at him. I head towards the bedroom and he grabs my hand. I pull away and say "Just get dressed." before heading to the closet to get dressed myself.

Pulling up to the hospital, Venus is holding the baby when we walk in. Happy goes back to do his part of the test and the woman is sitting there with the carrier in the floor and she won't even look at him. Happy comes back out and sits next to me. He tries to hold my hand and I pull away. "I need some air." I say before getting up and heading out. "I got her." Tig says and follows me out.

I sit on the bench outside and just look down at my hands. "Talk to me Doll." Tig says as he sits down. "He tells me he wants to try for a kid. We should have already had one but that got shot all to hell and now he may have a kid with someone else. I don't know if I can handle that. Hell, she won't even look at the baby. He didn't ask for this." I say. "I know but Happy fucked up and now he might have a kid. Is that going to make you walk away?" he asks. "I don't know. Part of me thinks I should take it as a sign that shit won't change but then again, another part of me thinks that his kid or not, that baby needs parents that love him and will take care of him. She has him in a carrier with nothing but a diaper on and won't even look at him." I tell him. "What are you going to do?" he asks. I look at Tig and ask "If the baby is his, I'll help Happy raise him. But if he's not, would I be completely insane for offering to adopt him just so he has someone that gives a shit?" I ask. "No Doll you wouldn't be. You're an amazing woman. You'll be an even more amazing mom." he tells me. "You know, we're trying for a kid." I tell him. "That's great sweetheart." he tells me. We sit there for a couple of minutes and I say "You know, you've been good to me Tig. You and Quinn both. It feels good to have some brothers to turn to." I tell him and he hugs me.

We head back inside and I sit down next to Happy. I look at him and ask "Can we talk?" He nods and we head for the hallway. "Where's your head at on this?" I ask. "If he's mine, I'll take care of him. Get what he needs." he says. "If he's not?" I ask. "What are you thinking?" he asks instead of answering. "If he's yours, I'll help you raise him but I adopt him and he will be mine. You can tell by looking at her that she doesn't give a shit about him." I tell him. He lets out the breath he was holding and pulls me close but I pull away a little. "What is it?" he asks. "If he's not yours, would you be opposed to adopting him anyway? He needs parents that love him and will be there for him and she's not going to do that." I tell him. "Is that what you want?" he asks. "Yeah but…" I start but he stops me. "If that's what you want, that's what we'll do." I look at him and he says "I want a big family babe." I nod and he kisses me softly. "The doctor is looking for you Hap." Quinn says as he slowly walks up to us. Happy looks at me and I say "Let's see what they say."

We head to the office and she's sitting next to us. "According to the results, this baby is your child." the doctor says. "I'll give you all a minute." he says before leaving the room. "What are you wanting?" Happy asks. "For you to take him. I can't be his mom." she tells him and pushes the carrier over towards us. "What's his name?" I ask. "Charles Victor Lowman. I call him Charlie." she says. "Follow us to the clubhouse. We'll get the lawyer to draw up the papers to sign over your rights and my wife wants to adopt him." he tells her and she nods.

Once we get the papers signed, she looks at me and says "He deserves better than this and I can't be a mom." I nod and say "This means you don't get to know anything about him. That what you want?" I ask. "I just want him taken care of and I don't want to be the one to do it." she tells me. "I'll take care of him." I say and she nods before walking out. Venus walks over and says "Well, let's take Charlie and go do some shopping and get what he needs." I nod and Happy says "We'll take the truck and the guys will help me set everything up." Charlie starts to cry so I pick him up and hold him close and he immediately stops crying. "I got you sweet boy. Mommy's got you." I tell him and he snuggles into me.

After shopping, the nursery is set up and I am sitting in the rocking chair, feeding Charlie. Happy stands at the door, watching us. "That's a good look on you." he says softly. I don't look up at him and I don't speak. I just continue rocking him and feeding him. Happy walks over and kneels in front of me. "Talk to me babe." he says. "You have a son." I say softly. "I'm sorry babe." he tells me. "Do you ever wonder if the baby we lost was a boy or a girl?" I ask. "Sometimes." he says. I finally look at him and say "No more surprises, okay? I don't know if I can handle any more." He kisses me softly and says "Okay." before looking down at the sleeping baby in my arms. "Thank you." he says and I just nod.

After laying Charlie in his crib, I walk out to the back deck to get some air. Happy walks out and sits next to me and I reach over and take his hand. "I love you Happy." I say. "I love you too babe." he says before kissing my knuckles. "I still want to try for a baby but no matter what, he's our son." I tell him. "Anything you want little girl." he says. I look up at him and say "Till the Reaper comes." He smiles softly and says "Till the Reaper baby." before pulling me to sit between his legs on the steps and just holds me close while we listen to Charlie's little snores through the monitor.


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter 11

Waking up the next morning, I am in bed alone. I lay there for a minute and I hear Happy over the monitor. "I got you kid." he says and after a couple of minutes, I hear "We're lucky kid. You're mom, she's amazing. She puts up with me screwing up and still somehow loves me. Now, here you are and she took you as her own, no questions asked. I love her so damn much and you...I didn't know you existed kid. But you're here and me and your mom love you and we'll do everything we can to protect you." he tells Charlie. I get out of bed and move to the nursery door. I lean against the frame and watch Happy holding Charlie and all I can think about is how she didn't want him. I put my hand to my stomach and turn away with tears in my eyes.

I walk to the back deck and Happy walks out, holding Charlie. "You okay babe?" he asks. I nod but don't look at him. He moves closer and stands behind me. Putting his arm around me, still holding Charlie with his other, he pulls me back into him. "Talk to me babe." he says. I turn to look at him and he wipes the tear from my eye. "How could she not want him?" I ask. "I don't know babe but I know you're a better mom to him already than she ever would have been. I see it when you look at him. You love him." he tells me. "I do. I love him so much." I tell him. "I saw you touch your stomach." he tells me. "Just wondering if I'll ever have one. I lost one. What happens if I lose another?" I ask. "You won't. I'll be here this time. I won't fuck up again." he tells me. I take Charlie from him and he snuggles into me. Happy puts his arms around both of us and says "We're going to have more kids babe. I promise." he tells me and I just nod.

After putting Charlie to bed, we lay down and he pulls me close. I lay there in his arms and neither of us say anything. "I missed this. All these years, I missed this." I say. "Me too." he says. "Why did you do it?" I ask and he looks at me. "Why did you cheat on me all those times?" I ask. "I was stupid." he tells me. "That's not an answer Happy." I say softly. "I know. I'd spent years just fucking anyone I wanted to. Not having an Old Lady and then when I found you I fell in love with you. Gave you my crow. Married you. Looking at all of my brothers hooking up with anyone they wanted, part of me missed it." he tells me and I pull away from him. Before I can say anything he says "I don't miss it now. When we lost Jax, Juice and Bobby, I started thinking about things. Thinking about what I missed more, being single or you and it started hitting me that I missed you more. I loved you more. I needed you more. Babe, it made me realize I would give anything to be with you. I would give up my club if it was what you wanted." he says. "I'd never ask you to do that though." I tell him. "I know. But I would. And now I have you and Charlie and you're all I need." he tells me. "I think we should wait until Charlie is a little older before we try for more kids." I tell him and he nods. I turn my back to him and he snuggles up behind me and just holds me as close as he can get me.

The next morning, I wake up and hear Charlie's little cries. I get up and head in there to get him and while I'm changing his diaper, Happy walks in with his bottle. "Thanks." I say and he kisses me softly. "Love you." he says. "Love you." I say before feeding Charlie. Happy heads to take a shower and I am sitting there watching Charlie and he's looking up at me. "Mommy and Daddy love you little boy."


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter 12

It's been a month since Charlie came to live with us and I've been concentrating on him. I'm depressed. I'm barely speaking to Happy and I'm still having sex with him but just go through the motions. I am at the clubhouse with Charlie and Happy is working in the garage. I walk to the dorm to change Charlie's diaper and when I come out, one of the croweaters is standing there waiting on me. "Told you it wouldn't be long before he came back to us." she tells me. "Whatever." I say before trying to walk away. "Where do you think he was last night? He's got you taking care of his kid while he's here fucking me." she tells me. I shake my head and walk into the main room. I put Charlie in his carrier and head out to the car, not speaking to anyone. Happy sees me leaving and runs up to me. "Where are you going?" he asks. "Home." I say before closing the car door after putting Charlie in. "What's wrong?" he asks. "Nothing. You should stay here for a while." I tell him and go to open my driver door. "What? Why?" he asks. "I don't want you there right now." I tell him. Pinning me to the door, he cups my face and I whisper "Please don't." He still holds my face and asks "What's wrong?" I don't look at him but say "Where were you last night?" I ask. "I told you. We were meeting with the Mayans." he tells me. "You weren't here fucking one of the whores?" I ask. "What? Hell no." he tells me. "Please don't lie to me." I tell him. "I'm not fucking lying to you. Who told you I was here?" he asks. "Doesn't matter. It's okay." I tell him before trying to pull away. "Who said it?" he asks again. "Lori." I say. He looks at Lyla and says "Stay with Charlie." She nods and he takes my hand and pulls me to the clubhouse. Walking up to Lori he says "You telling my Old Lady I'm cheating on her?" he asks. "Not like you haven't before." she says. "Are you telling my Old Lady I'm cheating on her?" he asks again. "Yes. She doesn't even belong here. You haven't touched us since you got back with her." she says. "Get your shit and get out of here. You show your face here again and I'll cut it the fuck off." he tells her and she runs out of the clubhouse. He turns to me and cups my face and says "Baby, I wouldn't do that to you again. I promise." he says. "It's okay. You should." I tell him and walk away from him.

I walk out to the car and leave. Pulling into the driveway at home, I get Charlie out and take him inside to rock him to sleep. I'm still sitting in the nursery, Charlie sleeping in my arms and tears falling from my eyes when Happy walks up to the door. "Hey." he says softly so not to wake Charlie. "Hey." I say as I wipe my eyes. He walks over and takes Charlie from me and lays him in his crib before taking my hand and leading me out to our bedroom. Sitting on the bed against the headboard like we used to, he pulls me between his legs and just holds me. I snuggle back into him and sob. "I'm here baby. I told you I wouldn't fuck up again and I won't. I promise you." he tells me. I get myself together a little and pull away from him. "Happy…" I start and he stops me. "Don't do that." he says. "Happy…" I start again and he stops me again. He pulls me to straddle him and cups my face and says "Get that shit out of your head. I know you've been depressed. I know you got that shit in your head that I want to go back to that but I don't." he says. "Happy…" I start one more time and when he goes to speak I say "I'm pregnant." He cups my face and says "You're pregnant?" he asks. I nod my head yes and he crashes his lips with mine and we don't separate until we're both gasping for air. "How far along are you?" he asks. "Six weeks." I tell him. He kisses me deeply again and puts his forehead to mine. "I love you so fucking much little girl." he tells me. "I love you more Giant. God I love you so much." I say before he kisses me again and puts his hand to my stomach and putting his forehead back against mine. Now all I have to do is keep from losing this one.


	13. Chapter 13

Chapter 13

Waking up the next morning, I am in bed alone. I hear Happy over the baby monitor "Hey little dude. Let's get that ass cleaned up." he says and I can't help but smile that he's actually changing a diaper. After a couple of minutes I hear "Now, let's get that belly full." he tells Charlie. I get up and walk to the nursery and see Happy sitting in the rocker, feeding Charlie. "Morning." I say. "Morning babe. How are your feeling?" he asks. "Okay." I tell him, not wanting him to know I'm worried I'm gonna lose this one. "Come here." he tells me. I walk over and sit on his lap. "Talk to me." he says. "I'm okay." I say. He looks at me and I stand up. "I'll start breakfast." I tell him and he nods.

After I get breakfast done, Happy brings Charlie in. I get our plates and then take Charlie from him and just sit and hold him while I eat what little is on my plate. When we get done, Happy takes the plates and puts them in the dishwasher while I change Charlie again and put him down since he fell asleep. I'm standing there looking at him when I feel Happy's arms wrap around me and he starts rubbing my stomach. I stop his hand. "Don't do that. Not right now." I tell him and pull away. I walk out to the living room and he follows me. "What's going through your head?" he asks and gives me a minute to get my thoughts together. "I'm scared Happy. I'm scared you're going to cheat again. I'm scared I won't be a good mom. Hell, I'm scared I'll lose this one like I did the other baby." I tell him. Cupping my face, he kisses me softly and says "It's gonna be fine babe. Just concentrate on Charlie and our little hell raiser and everything will be fine." he tells me and I nod. "As far as me cheating, that will never happen again. I'm all yours." he tells me and I just nod again.

After we talk, he says "Let's head to the clubhouse and tell everyone the good news." I shake my head. "I don't want to tell anyone until we're at least past the first trimester, please." He kisses my forehead and says "Okay. We can wait. But I still want you at the clubhouse with me." he says and I nod.

We pull up to the clubhouse, him on his bike and me and Charlie in my car. When I get out, Happy walks over and kisses me softly and then grabs Charlie's carrier out of the car and laces his fingers with mine before we walk inside. We walk over to one of the couches and he puts the carrier on the floor. I sit on the couch and take Charlie out and he snuggles into me. "That baby loves his mama." Venus says. "Yeah. He does." Happy says and I look up at him and smile softly. "How are you doing little one?" Venus asks. I don't speak. I just look down at Charlie and hold him closer. Venus looks up at Happy and he says "She's worried about some shit." She puts her arm around me and says "Whatever it is, we are all here for you sweetheart." she says and I feel a tear start to fall. I hand Charlie to Happy and head to the bathroom, tears falling down my face. Venus follows me in. "It's okay sweetheart." she tells me as she pulls me into a hug. "No it's not. Venus, I'm pregnant." I say softly. "Well, baby girl that is wonderful news. Why don't you seem happy about it?" she asks. "I am. I really am. I want this baby but the last time Happy and I got pregnant, I caught him cheating on me and I was in an accident leaving and lost the baby. What if…" I start. "Stop that right there. No what ifs. There's no such thing as what if. What if the water in the tap turned to soda? What if the rabbits sprouted wings to fly? What if the sky suddenly started raining apples? So many what ifs that don't matter to a hill of beans. So, tell me what has you so upset about this little miracle?" she asks. "I don't want to lose this one. I can't lose this one." I sob. "You won't baby girl." she says before cupping my face. "Listen to me. You have me and Lyla and every man with a reaper to help make sure that doesn't happen. You have perfect little Charlie and you will have this perfect little angel just try not to stress." she tells me and I nod.

After cleaning up my face, we walk back out and I take Charlie from Happy. I snuggle him against me and he is sleeping. Happy wraps his arms around me and whispers "Are you okay?" I nod and whisper "You should tell them." He looks at me and I nod slightly and he kisses me hard before whispering "I love you so Goddamn much." He turns to everyone and says "Listen up. We got something to say." Everyone turns to us and I look at Venus and she nods her support. "We're having another kid." he says and everyone comes up to us and hugs us. When Tig gets to us, he hugs Happy and then cups my face and says "Congrats Doll." before kissing my forehead. Quinn hugs me and whispers "It's going to be fine. We got you." he says and I nod before another tear falls. I move to the couch and sit with Charlie and Happy moves over with me. Sitting beside me, he tilts my chin up and kisses me softly. "Our boy and our little hell raiser are going to be just fine babe. I promise." he says and I smile softly and say "I hope so."

We decide to crash in the dorm and have Charlie in the bassinet we keep in there. Lying in bed, Happy puts his hand on my stomach and I feel him rubbing circles. "I want a girl." he says and I look at him like he has two heads. "What?" I ask. "I want a little girl. A daddy's girl." he tells me, looking down at my stomach. I tilt his chin up to look at me and say "I want that too. But what if we have a boy?" I ask. "I'll be happy with a boy too." he says before kissing me softly. "I love you Happy." I say. "I love you more little girl."


	14. Chapter 14

Chapter 14

Waking up the next morning, I am in bed alone. I look over to the playpen and see that Charlie is gone. I get up and dressed and head out to the main room in search for my husband and son. I walk into the main room and I see Happy sitting on one of the couches feeding Charlie. I walk over to the bar and the prospect gives me a cup of coffee. "Thanks." I say before walking over and sitting on the couch next to Happy. "Morning baby." he says. "Morning." I say. "How are you feeling?" He asks. "Okay I guess. Still worried but I think with everyone else knowing it might not be so bad." I tell him. "Good. You know I won't cheat again right?" he asks. "I hope not." I tell him. He kisses me softly and I hear Charlie cooing. I look at him and cress his little face. I look back at Happy and he's smiling. "I love you little girl." he tells me. "I love you giant." I tell him. I lay my head on his shoulder and just look down at our son, my hand instinctively going to my stomach. "Everything will be fine." he tells me and I can only hope he's right.

A little later, I am sitting on the picnic table outside holding Charlie. Venus walks over and says "Why don't you let me take Charlie to the sitter. We're having a party tonight and you need to relax a little." Venus tells me and I nod. Happy is working in the garage and I see a car pull up. Venus takes Charlie from me and is holding him when I see a woman get out. "Are you fucking kidding me?" I ask. "What?" Venus asks. "Nothing." I say before asking Brooke to take Charlie inside. Venus looks at me and my hand goes back to my stomach. I watch her walk over to Happy and as soon as she puts her hand on his back she says "Hey Happy." He stands up and backs away. "What the fuck are you doing here?" He asks. "Some of the Tacoma guys said you were in Charming now so I thought I'd come down here and see you. See if we can hook something up again." she says. "Fuck that. Get the fuck out of here." he says. "What's the matter baby?" she asks, still trying to push up on him. "Back the fuck off." I hear him yell. Finally having enough, I walk over and step next to Happy and say "I believe he said to leave him alone." She looks at me and asks "Who the fuck are you?" Happy steps in front of me and says "My wife. Now get the fuck out of here and don't come back." he tells her. "Thought you left that bitch?" she asks. I grab Happy's gun and put it in her face. "Back the fuck off before I blow your Goddamn brains out." I tell her. Happy reaches and gently takes the gun from my hand and the whore says "You're fucking crazy." Happy puts the gun back in her face and says "I won't let her kill you but I fucking will." he tells her. She backs away and as soon as Tig walks up and gets her to her car, Happy goes to pull me to him and I pull away. "Don't." I say and walk away.

I walk into the clubhouse and get Charlie from Brooke. "Are you okay?" Brooke asks and I shake my head no before walking back to the dorm with my son. Walking in, I walk to the bed and sit against the headboard, holding Charlie against me, I start to sob. I hear the door open but I don't look up. The bed dips down and I feel Happy pull me to him. He doesn't say anything but I hold Charlie closer and start to sob harder. "I got you baby." He says softly. I snuggle closer to him as I sob and he kisses the top of my head. "I don't want anyone but you baby. Please believe me." he tells me. I get myself together a little more and say "I want to believe you Happy. I really do." I tell him. "I love you so fucking much Raven. I told you I wouldn't fuck up again and I won't. I didn't know she was gonna show up." he tells me. "I know Happy." I say. I pull away from him and he just looks at men. I move to lay Charlie's sleeping form in the play pen and move back to the bed with Happy. He moves to lay lay down, having taken his boots off and his kutte. "Come here." Happy says. I move into his arms and he kisses me softly. I kiss him back and he deepens the kiss just a little and before I know it, the kiss becomes more hungry and I move to straddle him. Sitting up to kiss me again, he whispers "Gotta be quiet baby." I kiss him again but this time it's slow and passionate. He pulls my shirt over my head before he unclasps my bra and tosses it to the side too. I pull his over his head and toss it to the floor. I stand and take my shorts and panties off and he starts taking off his jeans and boxers. I move back to straddle him and lower myself onto his hard member. We both moan into the kiss at the sensation. I move up and down slowly and he kisses me the entire time, both of us moaning until we find our release together.

I move off of Happy and we lay down together. "I love you Raven. I mean it. I love you so fucking much." he says. I look up at him and say "I love you too Happy. Just when I saw her get out of that car, it all came back. It was like it was all happening all over again." I tell him. "There's a difference this time." he says. "What's that?" I ask as I snuggle into thim. Kissing the top of my head he says "I'm not being stupid this time." I look up at him and he says "I won't be stupid this time." I lean up and kiss him softly and we spend the next little bit, laying together, still naked, just being together.


	15. Chapter 15

Chapter 15

A little later, we are sitting out in the main room and Venus has Charlie and I jump up and head to the trash can and start getting sick. Happy is right behind me and I pull away from him a little and say "I'm okay. Just my nerves." I tell him and one of the croweaters brings me over some crackers and ginger ale. "Thanks." Happy says and she nods before walking away. Cupping my face he asks "You sure you're okay?" I nod and say "Yeah. Just need to sit back down." I tell him. He looks at me concerned and I wrap my arms around him and say "I'm okay." before he walks me over to the couch to sit down. When I sit, Venus hands me Charlie and he snuggles into me and I look up and see Happy smiling.

It's not long before I start to yawn. "You wanna crash here?" he asks me. "Yeah. I'm just so tired all the time." I tell him. "Baby, being pregnant takes a lot out of you." Venus says. "Yeah well I don't have time to rest too much. Got too much to do with this one." I tell her and her and Happy smile. "We got you baby. You rest with little man all you want. We got you." Venus tells me and I can't help but smile. I yawn one more time and Happy says "Let's get you and the kid to bed." I nod and we head to the dorm. Getting into bed, Charlie in his crib and Happy pulls me close. I have my back to him and he has his arms around me and his hand on my stomach. I put my hand on his and rub his hand with my fingers, lightly. "Are you happy about his Hap?" I ask softly. I feel him place a kiss to my bare shoulder and he says "I don't think I've ever been this happy. I got my Old Lady, my kid and another on the way. Only thing missing is Ma." he tells me. I turn to face him and say "You think she didn't hand pick these two Hap? I knew your mom. I promise you, she's the one that pushed us back together and she picked our kids for us. She's here in her own way." I tell him. "If we have a girl, would you be okay with naming her after Ma?" he asks. "Elena Marie Lowman. We can call her Lena." I tell him. "I love you." he tells me. "I love you too Hap." before he pulls me close and we both drift off to sleep.

Waking up the next morning, I wake up and hear Charlie cooing. I look up and Happy has him on the foot of the bed changing his diaper, his bottle ready. "Morning mama." Happy says. "Morning daddy." I say before kissing him softly. I look at Charlie and he's looking right at me. I lean down and kiss his little nose and say "Morning baby boy." before I pick him up and start to feed him. I look down at him and I hear Happy ask "How are you feeling with everything?" I look up at him and smile softly and say "I think things are going to be okay. I know you love me and I know this time I'm not in this alone. I have you and the club and our little man." I tell him. "Good. I just want you to be happy." he tells me. "I am baby." I tell him.

We head out to the main room and Venus walks up and says "Give me my nephew." I laugh and hand Charlie to her. She holds our son and Happy pulls me closer to him. Whispering in my ear he says "Thank you." I look at him and he says "For forgiving me." I kiss him softly and say "Thank you for coming back." He holds me tighter and I can't help but smile. I look around and see our entire family smiling back at us and our growing little family.


	16. Chapter 16

Chapter 16

***Twenty Weeks Pregnant***

Sitting in the waiting room at the doctor's office, Happy has Charlie in his lap and he looks at me and mumbles "Mamama." I smile and take him as he reaches for me. "What it is baby boy?" I coo at him and he leans forward and gives me kisses. "He loves his mama." the woman across from me says. "Yeah he does." I say as I snuggle him. "Two little ones. You're going to have your hands full." she says smiling. "They have plenty of aunts and uncles to help chase them." I say and she looks at Happy's kutte and says "I have no doubt. Congratulations you two." she tells us and there's no judgement in her eyes. "Thank you." I say as Happy kisses my temple.

We get called back and they take vitals and do measurements before pulling the ultrasound machine over. "Well, let's see how the little one is doing." she says. She runs the wand over my stomach and we hear the heartbeat. "You want to know what you're having?" she asks and we both nod and you hear Charlie cooing. Moving the wand a little more, she says "You're having a little girl." I look at Happy and he says "Elena." and I smile.

We head into the clubhouse and Venus walks over and Charlie reaches for her. Taking him from Happy, she asks "Well?" I laugh and say "We're having a girl." Happy says. Everyone looks at us and Tig says "Holy shit SAMCRO's getting a Princess." and everyone starts congratulating us. "You thought of names?" T.O. asks. "Elena Marie Lowman." I say and Tig smiles. "After your mom?" he asks and Happy nods. "Well, now that we know what you're having, we can start getting what you need for the little one." Venus says and I can't help but smile. "I have to thank you all." I say and they look at me confused. "When I found out I was pregnant, I was honestly freaking out. I didn't know if I was going to be able to handle shit but you all stood by me and helped me. I love you guys." I say and they all smile and start hugging us. Venus cups my face and says "We will always have your back little one. No matter what."

That night, we are laying in bed, listening to Charlie snore over the monitor and Happy has his arms around me and my back is to him. He has his hand on my stomach and rubbing when all of a sudden he asks "What was that?" I start laughing and say "That would be Elena saying hi to daddy." I say and he smiles wide. That rare smile that only I get to see. I turn onto my back and he moves down and kisses my stomach. "Hey baby girl." he says and she kicks again. "She likes your voice. Seems to be most active when she hears you or Tig." I say. He looks up at me and I ask "Would you be okay asking Venus and Tig to be godparents?" He moves up beside me and says "Yeah babe. I think they'd like that."

The next day, we are at the clubhouse and I ask Tig and Venus to sit down with us. "What's up doll?" Tig asks. "Happy and I were talking last night and we want you two to be Charlie and Elena's godparents." I say and they both smile and say "Yeah doll. We'd be honored." before hugging us both and kissing Charlie's head.


	17. Chapter 17

Chapter 17

***Forty weeks and four days pregnant***

I am sitting on the couch and I am miserable. My legs are crossed under me and my hands are on my stomach. I still haven't gone into labor and I am four days past my due date. Happy walks in from the kitchen with a cup of coffee for me and I just hold it as the tears start to fall. "Why won't she just come out?" I ask Happy. "I don't know babe. But you have a doctor's appointment in the morning. Maybe they will induce." he says. I look at him and shake my head. "Hand me my laptop babe." I say and he does as I ask. I pull up Google and start searching ways to induce labor. Happy looks over and sees what I am looking up and starts looking at it with me. "You could drink castor oil." he says and I look at him like he has three heads. "Fuck that." I say. Seeing eating spicy food and I look at Happy and he shakes his head. "No. Last time you ate something spicy you were sick for three days and that's before we got pregnant." he tells me. Charlie is with Tig and Venus for the night so we can pretty much try anything. Looking farther down the list, I see that sex can induce labor. I look at Happy and he smirks. I put the laptop down and he helps me to stand.

Getting to the bedroom, we start stripping down and I lay down with him hovering beside me. Kissing me deeply, he moves over me and pulls my legs up over his shoulder and enters me. Thrusting in and out over and over, I start to come undone and find my release with him finding his inside me. Helping me up, I move to the bathroom to shower and as soon as I get into the bathroom, I say "Thank fuck." Happy walks in behind me and smiles when he sees that there is water on the floor. "My water finally broke." He kisses me before helping me clean up and is cleaning up the floor while I am getting dressed.

Heading out to the car, we head to the hospital and I call Venus along the way. "Everything okay little one?" she asks. "Yeah. My water finally broke." I tell her. "Alex is on his way and I have our little prince." she tells me. "Thanks V. Love you." I tell her. "Love you too." she tells me before hanging up the phone. Happy reaches over and takes my hand and kisses my knuckles.

Seven hours later, Elena Marie Lowman is born in all her tanned glory. She looks like me but is tan like Happy. I am sitting there holding her, feeding her and Happy is sitting next to me when everyone comes in. Venus brings Charlie to me and he starts mumbling "mamama." I kiss his little cheeks and he snuggles next to me and I put my arm around him as Happy takes Elena from me. "She's beautiful Doll." Tig tells me. "Thanks Tig." I say and he looks at Happy and says "Man, we need to start stockpiling ammo." I start laughing and Happy says "Who says I haven't already?" and we all laugh.

A little later, it's just us and Charlie, the prospect brought the playpen and Charlie is sleeping and so is Elena. Happy is laying on the bed with me, just holding me. "Thank you little girl." he says. I look at him and he says "For forgiving me." I kiss him softly and say "I love you Lowman."


End file.
